PARTAY!
by windwriter22
Summary: Alex is expecting to just have four or five friends over to watch movies, but when news of a parentless party spreads, and famous movie characters start showing up, the party really gets started. Used to be posted under different penname
1. Unexpected Guests

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A/N: Okay, so this story doesn't quite have to do with newsies. However, it has more characters from newsies than from anywhere else, as well as containing a number of newsie fanfiction writers. For that reason, I am posting it in the newsies section. 

Katrina: * pouring punch into punch bowl * Why do they call it a punch bowl? It's not really a bowl when you think about it. Bowls are small. 

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Alex: * smirking * Why do they call bowling bowling? You aren't using a bowl for that either.

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Lauren: * walks into room * When you finish pondering the meaning of life and snack foods can you please help me get the room straightened up? 

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Alex: Are we going to help her? 

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Katrina: No. 

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Alex: Okay. * grabs bag of chips * So, who all is coming tonight? 

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Katrina: Gimme some chips * catches bag that Alex tossed * Hmm.. I think Sweets, Frenchy, Fingers, and Sprite. And then of course Brandon and Jono. 

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Lauren: Sounds good to me. 

* doorbell rings * 

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Alex: I got it. * runs to door * Who is it? 

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Fingers: Who do you think it is? 

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Alex: * opens door * Heya. 

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Fingers: Do I smell popcorn? * pushes past Alex * POPCORN! * runs and steals the popcorn out of Katrina's hands * 

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Alex: Love you too. 

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Sweets: * walks through open front door * Yes, we all love you Alex. 

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Katrina: No, no, no. You all love me. I'm the pretty one. 

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Brandon: You're all my sexy bitches. * grabs Alex in leech hold * Hey there, sweets. 

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Sweets: Meow? 

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Brandon: Not you. Alex. * shakes head in desperation * Never mind.

* phone rings * 

* no one moves * 

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Alex: Okay, okay, I'll get it. Lazy asses. * picks up phone * Hey. * pause * WHAT?!? * pause * That dirty little whore! 

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Lauren: Why do I get the feeling something isn't going right? 

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Alex: FUCK!

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Lauren: Oh yeah, that'd be why. 

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Alex: Okay, well, there wasn't anything you could do. * pause * Yeah, all right, seeya in a few. * pause * 6615 Lakehurst. * pause * Just off Hillcrest * pause * Yeah. Take a left. * pause * Okay, bye. 

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Katrina: Is there a problem? 

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Alex: Apparently Mark passed out a bunch of flyers about a free beer party at our house and announced it on TV.

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Lauren: Mark? 

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Alex: Do the words "Empire Records" mean anything to you? 

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Frenchy: Oh shit. 

* knock on door * 

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Alex: No fuckin' way. 

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Fingers: * gets up and opens doors * Hey Jono. 

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Jono: Alex, what the hell is going on outside your house? 

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Alex: * looks out window * SHIT!

[At least twenty cars are visible outside of the house]

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Alex: MARK IS GONNA DIE! 

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Sprite: * walks up to the door * Don't kill him yet. * points to the crowd * Just look at who's outside. 

[On the lawn]

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Racetrack: What d'ya heah? What d'ya say? 

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Jack Kelly: Hey! Spot, dis ain't Santa Fe! Ya lied, ya bastahd. 

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Mush: How else was he supposed ta get ya heah? 

[At a different spot on the lawn]

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Ted: Bill, dude, this is MOST EXCELLENT! 

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Bill: Ted, dude, this isn't just excellent.. this is BODACIOUS!!

* bill and ted do air guitar * 

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Ted: EXCELLENT!

[Another patch of grass]

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Snake: * pointing to Avril Lavigne * Man, that girl over there is definitely a * snap * 

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Verena, Tinka, Odie, Tweety: FLAT CRITTER!

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Snake: You're learning quick. 

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Avril: Flat critter? That could be a good song! Lemme go tell my songwriter to work with my guitarist on it. * thinks * And I could put like some HARDCORE keyboards in it! That'll make people think I'm punk! PUNK RAWK!

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Neo: * pulls out gun and shoots Avril * That's better. 

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Morpheous: You really are the one!! 

[back to our favorite hero and heroines.. well.. sorta]

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Alex: We are so screwed. 

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A/N: Okay, so this came outta no where, but there's nothing wrong with that. I know, I know, I just keep starting new things. But I'm going to finish this one. This is my first attempt at humor and parodies, so please respect it. 


	2. Card Fetishes and Closet Snoggage

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[Back to the lawn again… aren't we always?]

Neil: What exactly are we supposed to do? Any of you been to parties like this? 

Knox: Whatever you do, don't make moves on the host's girlfriend.. not that I would know from experience. 

Charlie: * waltzes up to Kelly * And you may call me Nuwanda.. 

Todd: * overhears "Nuwanda" * Oh no, not again.

Kelly: That's what you think.. until you aren't. 

Nuwanda: Then who is?

Kelly: * points to Katrina *

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[The living room]

Alex: What am I supposed to do with this?

* silence *

Alex: * looks around the room * Where is everybody?

Jono: * leans into room * I think Frenchy's over there * points to closet * 

Alex: Thanks. * notices him leaving * And where exactly are you going?

Jono: Posh is here, my friend. Where do you think I'm going?

Alex: (jokingly) Hopefully to hell.. 

Jono: Why? Want the company?

Alex: * throws pillow at Jono * Now I'm on a quest to find everyone. Goodbye. 

* silence * 

Alex: * walks tentatively towards the closet * Frenchy? * waits for a response* Frenchy? * opens the door * 

Frenchy: * notices the light * Oh, sorry. Just giving Skittery a tour of the house. 

Skittery: Yeah. Interesting closet you have here. Lots of room for snoggage—I mean storage! 

Alex: Uh huh. Yeah. Umm.. Skitts? That closet is about two by two.

Frenchy: Honestly, how much room do you need? * grin * Of course, I'm referring to how many coats you have to hang. 

Alex: * laughs * Have fun, little kiddies. * closes door once again on Skittery and Frenchy * That was definitely not a good idea. Oh well. 

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[The Kitchen]

Race: Anyone got a deck of cards? Anyone? * starts to twitch * 

Jack: * checks pockets * Nah, sorry man. You stole my last deck and slept with 'em undah ya pillow. Nevah got dose back. 

Race: It ain't me fault! 

Jack: Dat ya kept em wit cha all day an' night. I know you'se a gamblah Race, but dat ain't normal. 

Race: Well, ya know, it's jus' a habit. An' we ain't gonna discuss it in front of da lady, are we? 

Alex: You sleep with your cards? * pause * Whoa, that didn't sound right. 

Race: 'S a long story, I'm shore ya don' have da time ta heah it.

Jack: Yes she does.

Alex: Nah, I really don't. I gotta get more food from the store. But I will hear it when I get back. 

Jack: Why doesn't Race heah jus' go witcha? 

Alex: Wanna?

Race: (puzzled) Wanna?

Alex: Want to come with me?

Jack: Of coise he does. Race, you'se goin' wit her or.. 

Race: Or what Kelly? 

Kelly: * leans in through doorframe * Someone say my name?

Alex: No, go away. 

Kelly: Okay * leaves * 

Alex: * turns back to Race * Now what's this about cards?

Race: Well.. ya see… * leans towards her ear and whispers * I have a bit of a card fetish. I think they're sexy. 

Mark: SEXY REXY!! "Say no more, mon amour!" 

Pie Eater: That guy is great.. he gave me some special brownies!! (singing) Puff the magic dragon smoked alot of weed. And Frolicked in... err.. the shroom garden... on... Christmas Eve.

Alex: * ignoring Pie & Mark * Sexier than me?

Race: Yep. 

Alex: * grabs purse full of coins * Fuck you. 

Race: You'd like to fuck me, wouldn't you?

Alex: No, but the Queen of hearts would be glad to. 

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A/N: And so that just about rounds up our fun for the day kiddos. Yup. Alrighty, nothing to say. Slider is supposedly writing the next chapter, so that's what you're awaiting. Pester her, not me! 

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Disclaimer: I'm posting this now cuz I didn't want to give anything away. Okay, Race & Skittery & Jack belong to Disney (if I owned them they'd be off doing something I just can't put into a PG-13 story. Neil, Knox, Todd, and Nuwanda belong to whoever made _Dead Poets Society_. Mark belongs to whoever owns the rights for _Empire Records_ (but I've stolen him and hidden him in closet.. don't tell)_. _Jono belongs to himself (though I wish he belonged to me). Kelly and Katrina own themselves. Frenchy owns herself, Pie Eater's special Puff song, and Race's card fetish. I own myself. Oh, and hitting people with purses belongs to me and Daniel. (LOOONG DISCLAIMER xD)

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Shoutouts:

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Firecracker: Hmm.. Jono. He's hot, man. In this story, no one has age. So I could bang his brains out. But who knows, I have lots of options in this story. It's special. 

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Lisa: Hehe. I'm glad you like it. I like it too. LOL. 

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Sprite: Falling out of your chair again? Heh. I hope so, then I will have done my job. Did you fall off the face of the earth? I haven't heard from you in forever!! Anyway, glad you like. 

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Frenchy: Well.. there's your Skitts. LOL. And I stole your song. And his card fetish. But you already knew all of this. Cuz I'm talking to you. That's special. Heh. 

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Anyone else who reviewed: I want to apologize. This thing says I got seven reviews, but I can only see four. So if you reviewed and didn't get a shoutout don't feel bad, that's why., 


	3. More Glam Than Bowie

[At the supermarket]

Alex: So, ya in any relationships? Other than your Queen of Hearts, that is. 

Race: It's not the Queen of Hearts that gets me off, it's that sexy assed Queen of Spades. *realizes what he just said* Aw, shit, don't repeat that. 

Alex: So are you saying that if I dressed up as the Queen of Spades I would get you easier than I can right now? 

Race: *nods* Yup.

Alex: Man, that's just messed up. *hands the cashier money*

Race: Well, don't you have one thing you just find amazingly sexy in your life? 

Alex: *grins* Short guys. Sometimes pirates, but mostly short guys. *looks down pointedly* Course, they also have to be big. Get my drift?

Race: Mind if I grab some whipped cream? It can be very useful in certain situations. *wink* ((a/n: omfg, whipped cream!!! man, good times, good times))

Alex: Miss of Spades' favorite?

[In the parking lot]

Cap'n Jack: This isn't the docks, eunech!

Will Turner: If I'm a eunech, then how have I managed to get Elizabeth pregnant?

Cap'n Jack: That was me. And the rum.

Will Turner: Oh yeah, good point. 

Alex: *walks out of store* Oi, who goes there?

Race: Where the hell did that come from??

Alex: What, its just fun! *evil grin*

Race: *olls eyes* And you say I'm odd.

Will Turner: Name's Turner, Will Turner. And that's Jack Sparrow.

Cap'n Jack: CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow. Why else would my little name thing on the script say "Cap'n."

Will Turner: What script? 

Cap'n Jack: *Pulls script from large vest pockets* This script. See, "Cap'n Jack" *points* So it's captain, savvy? *flips ahead in script* Someone's getting action tonight. Ah, they've been drinking rum. Of course. 

Alex: *astonished* Rum? At my party? *shrugs* Oh well. I could use a margarita. Or five. Well, seeya. 

Cap'n Jack: *points to script again* Wait, it says here you're supposed to invite us to your party!! 

Alex: I knew I was forgetting something!

Race: Dumbass. 

Alex: Did I hear something, card boy?

Will Turner: Did someone say cards? *twitch* I like cards!! That Queen of Spades, she's a looker!

Race: I know!!

Alex: Just shoot me. 

Cap'n Jack: I already used my last shot, sorry. 

Alex: *throws up hands* Bloody pirates! *looks around* You got a car?

Cap'n Jack: Fastest car on Royal Lane! *points to some sort of all-white sports car* I call it... The White Diamond!

Race: *staring with Will at the cards in his hand* Daaaamn, she's fine. 

Alex: *grabs cards* That just ain't healthy. Now get in the car, we're leaving. 

Will Turner: *tries to get cards unsucesfully* But, but, but!

Cap'n Jack: Aw, hush, ya eunech. Where's ya house?

Alex: Go straight on Royal and take a right onto Meadow then go till Thackery, turn, go two blocks, and turn right. 

Cap'n Jack: How 'bout I just find my own way, savvy?

Alex: As you wish.

[Back at the house]

Slider: Can I interest anyone in some snog and strip? 

[Crowd draws around here]

Slider: Jono, where's that bottle of rum you were drinking all night in an attempt to be sexy like Jack Sparrow?

Cap'n Jack: *walks in door* Nah, mate, to be sexy, ya gotta have the eyeliner. Alex, where's your make-up, we're gonna get this boy set up. 

[One hour later]

Curt Wilde: Dude, that's hot. 

Fingers: Aw, not you. Man, you scarred my virgin eyes with Arthur. 

Curt Wilde: Tough. That boy over there is hot. Reminds me of my rock n' roll lover. 

Jono: What the hell did you do to me, scallywag. *grabs mirror* I'm more fucking glam than David Bowie!!! It's like Elton John in the 70s!

Alex: Have you been watching "I love the 70s" on VH1 too? *notices blank stares* What? It's a good show! I was alive in the 70s! Okay, so maybe I wasn't. But I had an easybake oven!!

Jack: Race, what happened to this girl?

Race: That's what happens when you mock the card fetish!

Will Turner: Yeah, man. 

DISCLAIMER: Cap'n Jack & Will Turner belong to Disney (though Jack does spend a lot of time in my closet). Curt Wilde belongs to whoever has the rights for Velvet Goldmine. Race & Jack belong to Disney as well (Disney has a thing for hot guys named Jack, I'm telling you!) Jono, Sli, and Fingers belong to themselves. I own myself, and almost all of the humor in this. Fingers belongs her reaction to Curt, since she had severe issues after watching VG, which I really still have yet to see. 

SHOUTOUTS:

Since I deleted this off my other account, I don't have my reviews, so I apologize if I'm forgetting you (and I probably am).

Aurora: *New reviewer dance* *Gets dizzy* *Lands on Bowie!Jono and kisses him* Glad you like it. Hope you still do. 

Frenchers: Aw, man. Skitts/Frenchy is the best pairing ever. LOL. Well, best hetero pairing after Race/Spark & Spot/Sli. 

Sli: Of course you should have gotten a shoutout. But I'm an idiot, so you didn't get one. 

I know there's another review, and I apologize profusely to that person. Please forgive me and still review this chapter!!


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